52. Healing heartbreak

52. HEALING HEARTBREAK
Message -It is always challenging when a partnership comes to its natural end, particularly when you feel devastated and you potentially feel that you have lost the love of your life.

You can and you will get through this time. You will come out the other end stronger, more resilient, and whole. Whilst at present it may feel you did not choose this, please be assured that you did so choose this from your "higher selves' perspective," because this partnership just was not serving you, to get to where you need to be, to do what you came to the Earth plane to do. You may find this difficult to hear, but you cannot go back, so you must relinquish thoughts of reconciliation. There is, however, a whole new life to build and live, and this is something to get and then be eager for.

Rebuilding self
First, you need to rebuild yourself, as you lost your identity somewhat in this past partnership, so you must find yourself again with new ambitions, genuine nurturing friends, positive experiences, and the establishing of firm boundaries. Most importantly, be kind to yourself and allow yourself to grieve for a while and do not be in any rush to form a new love relationship. Considering the brain treats bonded LOVE akin to addiction, the neurological recovery process mirrors that of an addiction.

Foundations
The first thing you must rebuild is the new foundation for your new and exciting life. As foundations are always underground, there will be deep digging to do, and it will not always be easy, but please try to stay positive as you are not alone in this!

Children first
If you and your ex-partner have children together, you both should agree that the children must come first. This does not mean that you stay together for the children's sake, but that you both work co-operatively at consciously co-parenting and put the children's emotional well-being and rights first, above any feelings of grief.
• It is their right to feel safe.
• It is their right to be safeguarded from predatory behaviours.
• And it is their right to have parents who behave respectfully towards each other, even through separation and despite adversity.

Setting boundaries for the children's wellbeing.
If one parent is in a new partnership, they must make it clear to the new partner that they should never coercively use the children as instruments for point scoring or to control the other parent. Please do not go along this route because it is always the children who end up being scarred deeply and then learn how to manipulate, mainly as a survival strategy. Please know that the sadness you may feel now is only temporary, and you will come out the other side where the sun is shining, the sky is blue, and your strength and well-being are back in your possession.

Empowered women who choose to live without a partner.
Women often choose to remain alone for the children's protection, but they also choose this because they cannot find the qualities and depth they need from a partner (man or woman). She is alone because peace is her truth, and safeguarding herself and her children is her predominant mindset, her goal, and her sanctuary.

What makes a woman make this choice?
Why does a woman make the choice to remain single, particularly when the world often feels threatened or challenged by an empowered single woman? Traditional societies struggle to tolerate them. Well, she does it because in her sanctuary she chooses not to play mind games, and she recognises that in reaching her heaven, her hell must first be slain and the dark and light brought together. She recognises that there is no happy ever after; there is just awareness and conscious presence, then happiness drawn from this conscious presence. ]

Approval from others is not something she seeks, as she is self-reliant.
She has taken the journey of not needing another's approval and does not people-please. She bases her identity on her self-perception, ignoring others' judgments without reaction, choosing peace over drama.

Solitude is her present focus.
Neither is she lonely, but wise to the fact that an unequal partnership does not work for her. Her psychic abilities allow her to sense red flags immediately when something is amiss, and she may also have relationship fatigue. Therefore, she won't go there.

While she is on her own, she summons the courage needed to consciously confront her inner shadows, allowing her to heal her emotional pain. This is a tough journey to make as she can carry through her DNA, thousands of years' worth of cultural disempowerment and religious dogma to challenge and bring the light of conscious awareness to.


She wants LOVE but won't compromise her soul.
For a woman, choosing solitude doesn't stem from a lack of desire for love, for that beautiful connection, as she deeply yearns for it. She is more committed to the path of refusing to compromise her principles or her inner self. She is functioning at a different level. On this level, no crumbs are ever begged for, but expectations are chosen. So, she is selective and accepts only perfection, as she happily remains alone until perfection arrives. Not perfection in her potential partner, but perfection in what he brings to the table and his mindset!

What does he bring to the table?
• She is not interested in material wealth but values integrity
• Can he see beauty in her imperfections
• Has he matured emotionally and learned to work inwardly, or does he run when the going gets tough
• Is he looking for a mother replacement
• Can he meet her in mind, body, spirit, and soul, not to complete her as she is already whole, but to match her completion and share a depth of awareness that is conscious and mutual
• Is he emotionally available, so committed to commitment and maintaining this level of commitment
• Does he have a kind nature, and is he grateful for her? Is he awed by her empowerment and compliment it, or does he try to belittle
• Does he have intolerable habits or, more to the point, addictions
• Can he consciously partner with her and be willing to face the darkness together, in full conscious awareness, to reach the light
• Can he sustain this level of commitment, or does he become emotionally unavailable

Power Prompt: Take care when evaluating partnership potential. Make sure your future goals align before you commit emotionally.
Affirmation: I AM strong and in charge of my destiny! I surrender what I cannot control!
Signposts: Number: 52 - Letter: Z - Time frame: 10 months.
Element: Water - Pisces, Cancer, Scorpio.